When Cole came to us we felt uncertain about everything.
Creating a registry just felt wrong.
We had a month to prepare. This was not “our child.” This was a child we had agreed to take care of . . . and so began my own journey of uncertainty about what really made me a mama (a story for another time).
Graciously friends and co-workers gave us boxes with clothes and gadgets and things. We were independent and quietly walked forward into the unknown.
We knew more this time. More about what we needed to gather.
We had five days this time. I started searching Craigslist right away. We were both working. There was no weekend before baby would arrive. So we decided to go ahead and go for it. We would put a registry out there.
And we didn’t feel good about it. It felt hard, to ask for other people to take their time, to use their money.
It felt worse when the story seemed to change in two ways . . . the baby had some real medical issues that we were not sure we could handle and the more we knew the greater the chance that this baby would return to his family of origin.
Honestly, we struggled with it.
Even as items began arriving at our door before the baby, it all felt hard.
But it did shift.
As friends and family purchased items and connected with us it started to feel like we were not alone.
As we came to feel sure that this baby would be with us for months, years, and hopefully, forever, we wanted more and more to share him and our adventures with him with others. And even if it is not forever . . . he now enters the world with his first blankets and onesies from the people we love. And that is a great beginning to a little life.
A humble and great heap of gratitude to our friends and family.
And for other foster-to-adopt-mamas, go for it, reach out and register. It opens your hands to receive and isn’t that what adoption is about?